Think of all of those years. The happy moments, she knew. The loving moments, she knew. The sad moments, she knew. Every single moment is tarnished by the lies. You will never know how your life would have worked out. It could have been better, but I I guess, right now, it’s hard to imagine how it could be worse. This is betrayal, lying, and selfishness at its worst. Making America Great Since January 1991 Birthday 30 Years T-Shirt My deepest good wishes to you OP. Start taking your life back. Separation, Full 180, without doubt. Start the legal process (whether you follow through or not). Does she even get that she has rendered your life into lie. It’s not clear from your post that she is showing you any empathy at all.
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Man, I have read some tragic stories on this sub, but this takes the cake. I’m so sorry OP. I can’t imagine how it feels for you, but I wish you well. If you want to DM me, feel free. Dear God! I have no diaries to reference, but believe that my 34 year marriage may be based upon lies and deception. My pain is palpable, so I can’t imagine seeing the proof written in her own handwriting. Sending you strength and support. Making America Great Since January 1991 Birthday 30 Years T-Shirt Who cares what she’s saying right now. Her words are the words of a cheater and liar. They mean nothing. The only thing that counts are actions. What are her actions right now? What is she doing to earn your forgiveness?
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She has put in a lot of effort. Listened to a bunch of podcasts. Tried to turn her attitude around 100%. Making America Great Since January 1991 Birthday 30 Years T-Shirt Taken seriously what podcasters say WS needs to do to help the BS recover. But in the end it’s not natural to her. What I wrestle with then is what I can expect from her vs. what I want, and believe I have a right to expect. The expressions of remorse and empathy are more like what she knows she needs to say and should be feeling than something genuine. Do I settle for that? That’s what I wrestle with How old was she at the time? People grow up and mature. Not defending her at all, but sometimes young people do stupid crap. It doesn’t sound like all hope is lost.