Betrayal that happened at the start of a relationship and only discovered after years, may be worse than fresh betrayal, because it feels that your life is based on a lie. That you lost your agency back then and every choice you made since was based on her lies. No-one would blame you if you wish to walk away. Your wife was and remained utterly selfish and entitled. Making America Great Since January 1985 Birthday 36 Years T-Shirt There is no excuse on the face of this earth for what she has done to you. What’s worse is the pain of knowing that you.could have actually spent the last 33+ years with a woman that actually respected you and loved someone other than herself. I am truly sorry you are dealing with this. My heart goes out to you. I wish you nothing but good fortune and a happy rest of your life with whatever you decide to do.
Making America Great Since January 1985 Birthday 36 Years T-Shirt, ladies tee, tank top, v neck
I could think like this — but honestly it’s not how I’m thinking. This isn’t really about the past so much as what I want going forward. I’ve learned a lot about what I deserve and should expect in relationships, and I’ve also learned I don’t need to settle. Making America Great Since January 1985 Birthday 36 Years T-Shirt Right now staying in this relationship seems like settling, and that’s what I struggle with. I have a feeling that she has a bad memory when it is in her best interest to conveniently forget. I definitely understand what you mean about changing your life when you are older, it’s much harder. Personally, I think it depends on your wife, none of this “ I don’t remember” bs…she has to stand up and be accountable. She sounds narcissistic.
Making America Great Since January 1985 Birthday 36 Years Sweatshirt, hoodie
There are some questions about her memory — it is genuinely bad. She was once driving in a downtown of all one way streets. She missed a left turn. I told her to take the next right — to me simple, right, another right, then another right and you are on the street you missed the left turn for. Making America Great Since January 1985 Birthday 36 Years T-Shirt But after she made the first right turn she could not remember where she was. That being said — there is a pattern of her telling stories to herself that manage the cognitive dissonance between her behavior and her self image. And then she genuinely believes the story. That is her memory. She is not the standard narcissistic cheater. She gets genuinely ashamed when she has to confront what she did. But neither is she the genuinely empathetic and remorseful wayward spouse who makes reconciliation so much more acceptable.